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Connecticut author pens book of poems detailing living with mental illness - Fairfield Citizen

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MIDDLETOWN — Shortly after Andrew Mercado was released from Whiting Forensic Hospital in Middletown in 2019, he found himself in the midst of a pandemic with a story he felt had to be told.

Mercado used his spare time during lockdown to finish writing a book of poems, turning it into his first published work. “Poetry from Behind Mental Walls,” written under the pen name Chris Smith, which came out in late August. It has since brought Mercado a sense of self-fulfillment, he said.

“During COVID-19, there was a lot of dead time,” Mercado said. “I said let’s put pen to paper and see what we can do.”

Mercado was born and raised in Warrenton, Va. He briefly attended the Air Force Academy before earning a master of science degree in engineering physics from the University of Virginia. After a brief period working at a lab in Cleveland, Ohio, he enrolled at the University of Connecticut to earn his PhD.

It was in the final stretch of his PhD program when Mercado said things took a downturn. “I had my mental illness kick in and I couldn’t finish,” he said.

He admitted himself to Whiting Forensic Hospital in May 2013 after being overcome by auditory hallucinations. Mercado, who is also diabetic and legally blind, remained at the hospital for almost six years. He said he spent that time learning how to cope with his illness and writing poetry.

“I did everything I could to make myself better,” Mercado said.

Many of the poems give rarely seen insight into his time at Whiting, as many were written during his time there. “The book is about my life, and Whiting is a big part of it,” he said.

The subjects of his poems range from stories about hospital staff and fellow patients to memories of his childhood in Virginia.

He said he feels that writing and publishing a book is another step in the right direction for his mental health. “It’s cathartic,” Mercado said.

There are three main things Mercado hopes readers take away from his book. The first is to eliminate the stigma of mental illness by showing the public that people with these diagnoses are similar to everyone else and not “monsters.”

The second is to inspire other people with or without mental illness to tell their story, too. The third is for professionals in the mental health field to learn from the story told through his perspective.

“I wanted to tell about the plight of mental health from a patient’s perspective,” Mercado said.

He said that this is a rarity in the mental health field, since most publications on the subject are written by people who study or work in the field, rather than those with the issues themselves.

He said this doesn’t allow for a complete picture. “Sometimes the other side of the story has to be told,” Mercado said.

Mercado, now living in Danbury, spends his time working at CVS and writing future books. “I stick to my routines and I feel comfortable,” he said.

He already has two publications planned for the near future. The first is another poetry book that will serve as a sequel to his first work. The second he described as a guide for patients with mental illness who are entering a hospital for the first time.

“Poetry from Behind Mental Walls” is available to purchase at amazon.com.

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